Merry Christmas

May your Christmas be wrapped in the beautiful love of family and friends & adorned with the amazing glory of our Lord! Much love from my home to yours ♥

12/12

So it's my birthday... I'm 44... Has not been the best, but I guess it hasn't been the worst... Tomorrow marks the 3rd anniversary of my Mom's passing and the 22nd marks the 29th year of my Daddy's passing... On this day 29 years ago was the last good day I ever had with my Dad. I don't much like my birthday. I don't mind getting older - I just don't like the actual day... I suspect next year will really suck as Daddy was 45 when he passed and I will be 45 and appreciate just how young he was... My son will be 12 and that is how young my brother was when Dad died... I miss my parents so, so much...

Carmen

I haven't posted in forever... I have been in a funk, but today I am begging you to pray for my sweet cousin Carmen Preston. Carmen is a 9 year survivor of a double lung transplant as a result of being born with Cystic Fibrosis. Carmen has done remarkably well, up to now. Today, she is in a fight for her life. Actually, she has been in battle for about 6 days now. Carmen had been feeling bad for a couple weeks, so she went to Houston to see her specialists and they determined pneumonia in both lungs and then discovered that she is in acute rejection. Carmen is also having acute renal failure and is battling a major infection that they do not know the source of. Carmen is on life support and is on continuous dialysis for her kidneys. She hit a plateau and there were a couple of days that the MD's felt like they were doing all they could do and Carmen's "ultimate healing" would be in Heaven and not here on Earth. Carmen has experienced near death experiences and her family have seen "God whispers" during this crisis, as well as pre-transplant. Carmen and her sister, Madolyn and parents, Debbie and Kerry are believers and Carmen is very blessed. Today's report was not very positive, but I just got a text that Carmen responded to her father's voice and was trying to mouth the words of her beloved child - her faithful dog named "Volt" - named after John Travolta! Anyway - this is HUGE and I am asking everyone to pray for Carmen and her family. Pray for peace that surpasses all understanding, and for total healing - even if that means Heaven for our precious girl. Carmen is a fighter, but I know that unless she can come home completely herself, then she would be content to reside in God's kingdom. Faith in Christ is what is sustaining this girl and her family, and while we all want her to come back to us, we also respect God's plan and His will for our girl. Please pray that Carmen rests and for strength for her parents and sister. While their faith is steadfast, their bodies must be growing weary... Thanks and God Bless in advance...

Friends, must have make-up and SOA

It's late, so I will make this quick... Had a wonderful evening with great friends, cool beverages, and amazing food... It was really my first outing in almost 6 weeks since my neck surgery. My neck is doing well... My already jacked up lower back showed evidence of undesired change. I will have another MRI with contrast. At this time, I am will be able to return to work August 1. Anyway, I did full make-up before the evenings festivities... While largely and exclusively I wear Bare Escentuals - I did recently purchase Too Faced tinted Primed and Poreless. It looked too dark going on, but was easily remedied by the BE minerals. It's good stuff! I also use T00 Faced eye shadow primer and it's great! Another new discovery was BE's Well Rested for the eye area - like it, too... But my favorite new things are the Benefit High Beam highlighter for cheeks and the famed Nars Orgasm Blush. I know, crazy name - but it is great! I mixed a charcoal BE eye shadow with a bright gold one and the look was cool for evening... Thanks to Kelli Camfield for teaching me that combo! Love it! Self portraits didn't work so well - so no photos... I KNOW I have to step up the photos and fun on this blog very soon! Honestly, I haven't really figured it all out! Anyway - as for the makeup - if you only splurge on one thing - make it the High Beam! It adds so much depth! The blush is great, but they do make several cheaper brands that are pretty close - one of which is The Balm in Hot Mama. Now - with that all said - I'm going to wind down with an episode of Sons of Anarchy on Netflix. I know it's gritty and has explicit content - but I have watched all 3 previous seasons and can't wait for Season 4! Don't judge me! Blessings...

PS - I had to miss a small gathering of my 25th Reunion Classmates that met up on the Riverwalk in San Antonio - and I am sad about that - but I just don't think I am ready for a road trip. I also think my employers might frown on me having so much fun while on medical leave. But to my credit - I would already be back to work if they would let me - but I cannot go back with a weight-lifting restriction... It was a stretch to get my surgeon to agree to August 1...

Marriage

MARRIAGE

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside

the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.

My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage.

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

A CHRIST-CENTERED MARRIAGE IS A MARRIAGE THAT IS SURE TO LAST A LIFETIME.

So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. Matthew 19:6

P.S. This was sent to me from a friend and I do not know the people in this story, but I feel like it's worthy of sharing...

Ramblings on a Saturday

Just checking to see if this POS is going to let me post my blog? Good news came in the mail today, I do not owe ANY of my 32,000.00 neck surgery! Yay for me... Yesterday, bad news came via text from my direct boss - I can only return to work when I am free of restrictions and for now I have a 20lb lifting restriction... Saw the CEO of the hospital at dinner and made sure he knows I am planning to encourage my doc to FULLY release me. He said, "Tell him". I find out Thursday... If it's not safe for me to go back, I will have to take a LOA when my sick leave and vacation run out. I don't want to do that, but I so have short term disability with AFLAC. Ultimately - I will protect my neck, but I don't like the sound of LOA. It just occurred to me that I have written a whole bunch and if it fails to post, I am going to be plenty pissed...

javascript void can KMA

I have lost brain cells, sleep, and money trying to fix the javascript error that would not let me blog the last week or two. I have downloaded "fixes" and used different OS and it finally works after I uncheck the stay signed on option. WTH? SMH! OMG - this javascript void error has ruled and ruined my life and stolen valuable hours of sleep and dollars... I am so pissed... You can't imagine all the steps I took and stuff I had to read...

I got nothing - so I'm copying a lame ass note from facebook

So Kirk was going through my finances and asked me what a $180.00 charge in Brackettville was for. Me: my storage room. Him (with a shocked look): You still have that? Me: Yup - this month makes 11 years, I really need my stuff from there. Him: I bet it's all rotted. Me: No I spent a sh-boatload of money on storage totes and besides, Jennifer has been in there. Him: Who's Jennifer? Me: the lady that works there Him: shakes his head and walks away... Pretty sure he mentioned he hoped I didin't bring all that sh-stuff here! To which I called out as he closed my door: That stuff is important. Pictures, yearbooks, 5 err maybe 10 totes of shoes that will surely come back around, my trunk that a BFF knows to destroy if I die, my Croscill Bed and Bath stuff that's like brand new, the King Size bed that was researched for a month before an actual purchuse... My Stuff man! And no - it's not $180/mo - I just usually forget to pay until Jennifer sends me a reminder note! I cringe at the money wasted, but DUDE - it's MY STUFF! 32 years worth - all the important stuff PRE-LOGAN! I was gonna scan (aka take a picture of a picture) - of said STUFF but I can't because they all have people in them that would just create way too much drama and scandal! But looking through the pics reminded me of the most treasured pre-baby collection: My Rocking Horse's that I almost forgot I used to collect and all my wall art... WOW - I really want my SH-Tuff!!!

So Kirk is my brother that is way smarter at math than me, thus he balances my bank account. He also cooks like a bazillian times better than me... No kidding - he has a BBQ joint and catering business, but he cooks non-BBQ things, too. He's also a competition cook and he and my son love traveling to cook-offs. Me - not as much, but sometimes! I should also state he is an amazing uncle - affectionately called "Unk"...

Logan - well he's my 10 - closer to 11 year old reason for living... My life... My charming and precious boy... Ar least to me and most! He's full of life and if a song comes on - any song from any source - he's sure to bust a move! He's a Pee-wee football sack master and is becoming a pretty good baseball player - which would be why there were at least 3 occasions I spent about $400.00 at Academy. Crazy ridiculous! Not all baseball - lots of Under Armour that he wears daily and lots of shoes since he wears a MENS size 9.5. Really crazy!

Recovery is going pretty well - my incision is officially and ugly scar - but I can already say the surgery was a success, Friday was Day 11. I had a reaction to the skin glue and to the adhesives of all the different tapes used for bandages. Weird that I am allergic, yet at work I handle the same tape - a lot! I was supposed to be off 4 weeks, but the follow-up appointment is slightly less than 6 weeks. Probably for the best. I have full range of motion and my voice has pretty much returned to normal from the post-op hoarseness.

I realize I gotta step this blog up! It needs pics and more frequent posts and I need to get better at commenting on blogs. I recently starting Google Reader. Can you believe I used to go to each individual blog that was saved to my favorites? Crazy! But I don't know how to comment from Reader.

Shout out to GOGE - I will try to comment again very soon. Blessings my friends! I definitely pray for everyone!

P.S. Yes I love with my brother in my childhood home. My Mom and my son and I crashed his remodeled bachelor pad when Mom's home was destroyed by stachybotrys and at the same time as my ex and I sort of split because I wanted more for my son and I.

Blogger comments

I am still not able to post comments on certain blogs. I keep being asked to sign in, then I do and it repeats or posts the comment from anonymous and not from me... Grrr...

Survived ACDF

Well friends - my neck surgery went well. There were a few issues - surgery was delayed several hours, so my brother and son left me alone and went and did guy stuff. The OR nurse was to call him once I went in to the OR, then was supposed to call him back once I was in recovery. I don't know if he got the call or just showed up back in time - but he was plenty pissed my Neurosurgeon was not there to tell him how it went like he had said he would. This was due to an emergency surgery he had to do. Anyway - he showed up after that case was done and my family had left - it had been a long day - but he was kind enough to call my brother and give him the low-down... I thought that was pretty cool of him, and not something he HAD to do. Appreciate my MD! There are some funny moments throughout the surgery - but that's a whole other post and I am probably breaking some rule lap-topping 3 days post-op... More to come...

surgery

On Monday, June 6, 2011 I will be having neck surgery. Specifically anterior cervical discectomy and fusion of C6-C7. I have been having neck pain for almost 2 years and a recent MRI showed worsening of the spinal stenosis that is compressing my spinal cord. This causes my left shoulder to hurt/spasm and sometimes I get a numbness and tingling that goes down my right arm to my pinkie finger. I have lower back damage, too - but the risks outweigh the benefits for that procedure at this time. The neck surgery has a much better success rate and the recovery is not expected to be too bad. I trust my surgeon and am looking forward to having this behind me! Blessings to my followers!

can't comment???

Ugh - to GOGE - I am trying to comment thanking you for following me and to tell you I love your "Ripples" post and it keeps asking me to sign in to my google account (which I stay signed on) and then redirects. I tried to comment on my own post that you commented on - and it does the same thing! So it's not you, it's ME! So frustrated!

I will do a new post later - I have been MIA and not a very dedicated blogger! So Thanks to those that have stuck around!

Getting to know YOU - Sunday Edition

1. What's your favorite rainy day activity? reading, sleeping

2. What time do you go to bed? 10ish on work days which vary

3. How many magazines do you subscribe to? 0 - but I used to be an avid People reader

4. Did you sell all your belongings because you thought the world was ending yesterday? No - but I did post R.E.M.'s "It's The End of The World As We Know It" video on my facebook wall because I'm funny like that!

5. What's your beauty obsession? "It's a 10" for my hair and all things Bare Escentual...

6. If you could only wear one designer/brand for the rest of your life...what would it be? Ralph Lauren

7. What's your summer must have? flip-flops - Birki's, Yellow Box, Gypsy Soule, Old Navy

8. Do you make weekly dinner menus? If you knew me, you would know how funny this question is! For those of you that don't and might become a follower in the future, the answer is NO - I barely even cook! (Not holding my breath on that follower thing!)

This post is brought to you by my blog hopping http://greersgossip.blogspot.com/2011/05/getting-to-know-you-sunday_22.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+GreersGossip+%28Greer%27s+Gossip%29&utm_content=Google+Readerat:

Ponderings

These questions came from here: http://www.thevioletonline.com/
I am not sure if I'm allowed to copy them or answer them. Not really sure about blog etiquette, yet. But - I did give them the credit...

How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are? 30, I feel more 30 than 43 behavior wise...

Which is worse, failing or never trying? never trying

If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do? 'cos we are human and learn the hard way

When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done? unfortunately, probably

What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world? war - idk - I'm really not that deep

If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich? still being in the medical field

Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing? I believe in what I am doing, but am settling on parts of my life

If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently? more health conscious

To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken? I left when I knew my child and I needed and deserved more

Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things? both

You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do? Defend my friend

If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be? dance

Would you break the law to save a loved one? wow - probably

Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity? absolutely

What’s something you know you do differently than most people? parent my child

How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy? because we are created to be different

What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What’s holding you back? possibly further my education; I am held back because I am raising my young son and he comes first

Are you holding onto something you need to let go of? absolutely...

If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why? Hawaii because I loved it

Do you push the elevator button more than once? Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster? no I do not believe it makes it work faster... same applies to the red button at Sonic

Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton? joyful simpleton

Why are you, you? because He made me this way

Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend? not always

Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you? losing touch with the one that lives near

What are you most grateful for? my son, my brother, my friends and my job

Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones? I can't imagine either scenario

Is it possible to know the truth without challenging it first? yes

Has your greatest fear ever come true? no

Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now? yeah - unfortunately it still matters

What is your happiest childhood memory? What makes it so special? being at the lake with my parents - because I lost them way before their time...

At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?
If not now, then when? It has been a while - idk when, or possibly don't wanna say...

If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose? precious time with my son

Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever? no, can't say that I have

Why do religions that support love cause so many wars? good question - unfortunately I don't know the answer

Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil? no because I see evil masquerading as good ALL THE TIME...

If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job? I would hope not

Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing? I miss certain things - like being a Pedi nurse - but I am still content

Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before? absolutely

When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in? last night - still a dreamer

If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today? my son

Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous? no

What is the difference between being alive and truly living? unfortunately a lot of days I feel like I go through the motions and am not truly alive...

When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right? it's always the right time to do what's right, but that doesn't mean we/I do

If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake? because dealing with mistakes are not exactly fun

What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? probably put up with his shit a little longer

When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing? no idea

What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love? idk WHAT I love, only WHO I love and I don't think that is the point of this question

In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? What about the day before that? Or the day before that? not likely

Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you? I want to say that I am a leader and not a follower, but the reality is that I'm not...

23 Things

IDK where I "borrowed" this from - I ran across it in a facebook note from another place and time... It really makes me laugh! If I stole this from you, my sincerest apologies. I wasn't a bona fied blogger back then. Not quite sure I am now, either - but enjoy! #11 and 16 are my faves - but I can relate to all of them!

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blu Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch three consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from three feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time

Things heard at my son's little league game...

Go L.B. Go!

Rock and Fire Caleb, rock and fire...

Don't put up with that shit Logan!

Way to go Caleb! Good Job Raully! Run Logan!

Holy shit he knocked it over the scoreboard again!

Way to go Logie B! Good Job Red Sox...

Make it be your pitch Walker...

Now you've seen it Logan...

Kirk, quit yelling, you're wearing me out!

That's OK Slade... Way to hustle Raully!

God, I wish I had a shock collar!

Good job Wesley...

Good Game Red Sox!

Sleepless in the South

I can't sleep and I'm really pissed annoyed about this... I have taken the required pharmaceutical aides, to no avail... This feeling is exacerbated by the fact that I a 12 hour shift that begins in less than 8 hours. I need sleep. I have that mindset that I need to "hurry up and sleep". I don't know why sleep has to be so difficult to achieve. It certainly comes easily during the day on my day off! And just FYI, I didn't sleep during the day today, so there is no reason I shouldn't be able to sleep... This is such a boring post. I bet it lulls any potential readers to sleep. Isn't working for me, though... I have yet to hit a stride in this whole blogging thing. Interesting blogs have a lot of photos, but I am not sure how much I want to share. Also I follow a shitload ton of blogs, but I am not a very good at commenting. I realize that I need to get better at that if I want to attract any readers. Well - I'm not sleepy - but I am definitely bored by my own blog, so I hope the rest of blog-land is slumbering peacefully...

Blessings...

P.S. I actually wrote a post because I wanted to see if I could master "striking" through a word! Yeah - success!

A to Z meme borrowed from blog hopping

a.. age- 43
b.. bed size- King
c.. chore you dislike- doing laundry
d.. dogs- Willow Star is a tri-color basset and McQueen is a lemon basset (with lightening strike marking on his back)
e.. essential start to your day- Dr.Pepper
f.. fave colors- purple, pink, black
g.. gold or silver- silver
h.. height- 5'2 1/2 - the 1/2 is important!
i.. instrument you play- Clarinet in grade school
j.. job title- RN charge nurse
k.. kids- 1 amazing 10yr old
l.. live- West Texas
m.. moms name- Linda
n.. nicknames- TJ
o.. overnight hospital stay- way too many to list
p.. pet peeves- having to press 1 for English in the FREAKING USA es numero uno!
q.. quote from movie- The Notebook, "Young Noah: So it's not gonna be easy. It's going to be really hard; we're gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me... everyday."
r.. righty/lefty- righty
s.. simblings- younger brother
t.. time you wake up- as late as possible and depends on my work schedule
u.. underwear- optional yes?
v.. veggies you don't like- can't think of any
w.. what makes you run late- the snooze button
x.. x-rays you've had- again - way too many to list
y.. yummy foods you make- I don't really cook - Spaghetti is pretty tasty
z.. zoo animal faves- zebra's, lions, tigers

10 Tidbits of T in Texas

Well, it has been a while since I had anything interesting to blog about. I have also been really tired and battling some chronic back and neck pain. Pain is no bueno... I think I will post some random facts about me!

1. I really dislike talking on the phone. I enjoy keeping up with my friends, but I prefer to do that via text or facebook. I only have one friend that requires a marathon phone conversation because we usually have too much to talk about to text. I do it for her, 'cos I love her!

2. Friday night is my favorite night of the week, but I opted out of a celebratory gathering with friends so that I could chill at home and read blogs and catch up on facebook and pop culture!

3. I am addicted to makeup, yet I rarely wear it. We're talking only for very special occasions. Yet I look at what is new and trendy almost daily. I am usually loyal to one brand at a time. In my twenties and early thirties, it was all Este Lauder. By my mid-thirties, it was all Mary Kay. A few years later, I switched to all Lancome. Now I am ALL Bare Escentuals, sans my Too Faced eye makeup primer and my Balm Blush that is really similar to NARS famous Orgasm. I'm not sure it's enough like it to satisfy, so it's currently sitting in my Sephora and Ulta online shopping carts. I am pretty sure I have to have Urban Decay's Naked pallette, too!

4. I have naturally curly hair and used to think it was cool that people paid hundreds of dollars to get hair like mine. Well, now if I want beautiful straight hair, it's gonna cost hundreds of dollars! Thinking Brazillian Blowout and the products to keep it looking good! Ironically, the great product my stylist just turned me on to - "It's a 10" has my curls looking pretty good!

5. Today is Friday the 13th and that meant for unusual happenings in my ER today. Hoping Saturday the 14th is less weird...

6. I have a million favorite songs. Not sure I could pick just one favorite. I have very eclectic taste in music. My Mix CD's are well known - all the way back to the days they were cassette tapes before CD's.

7. I hope my son doesn't make some of the same small town mistakes I did, or his father did.

8. I wish my son's Dad would stand up for what is right and man up and be a Dad instead of cowering down to his insanely jealous/selfish wife who happens to have been one of my college roomies.

9. I can't believe my life could be written into an episode of Jerry Springer! I am not exactly happy or bragging about this...

10. I am currently obsessed with the following words or phrases I have recently read on other blogs! They are: amazeballs; ahhmazeballs; hot mess; word vomit (which this post kind of is!); Whiskey Tango Foxtrot; Please be gentle on me or I'm gonna have to go all buckwild crazy on your ass! That's pretty much all... Here I am just "living the dream"...

I wish this was so 10 minutes ago...

So I just picked up the boy from school and everything was fine... It all went south the minute we got home and he learned he couldn't go to his friends house. We want him fresh for his baseball practice. Whining and fit throwing ensued. He would never treat his Uncle, or another caregiver this way. He made the comment, "I wish it was so 10 minutes ago". Sometimes I feel the same way. He is being so defiant today and it makes me want to scream. The hardest part is knowing that he only reserves this behavior for me. I need a vacation...

A little about my family

This has been a lazy Sunday... I enjoyed some cuddle time with my boy - he's 10 and spent the weekend away with his Uncle. I missed him! He has a school holiday tomorrow and I have to work - booyah! I should have blogged yesterday, but I spent all my "alone time" after work reading a ton of new blogs! I am so addicted to blogs! My son asks why I want to read about people I don't know - I tell him it's like reading great books! I also do it to be entertained and inspired! I still haven't figured out what to post or what I want to say, or how much to share. I pride myself in being quick-witted, but when I click to post - "I got nothing"! I guess I will go read more blogs for inspiration! I will leaver you with a few facts - I am a single mom - not the way it was supposed to be - but my son is my life and he is my reason for being! His Dad is not very involved in his life, very sad... My brother and I are very close and he is an adoring Uncle. He is not married and has no kids of his own, so he treats my son like his own - lives vicariously through him also! Our parents and grandparents are all in Heaven - Daddy since 1982, Mom since 2008. So my immediate family is just my son and my brother. Despite all the loss - we are so very blessed to have each other... Bye for now... Blessings...

Labels

So I've been thinking about labels, specifically what kind of blog this would be... I realized that I don't want to be defined by labels... This is not going to just be a "Mom Blog" or a "nurse blog" or a "Spiritual Blog"... Though all these "labels" describe me - and - are relevant to my life - I don't want to be boxed in. I also want to be free to be ME. I am a Mom, I am a nurse, I am a Christian - but I also cuss like a sailor and like to attend social gatherings that involve wine and liquor and beer... I'm not perfect, and I don't even really aspire to be... I want to be the best Mom, nurse, and Christian that I can be - and I know what areas I am lacking - but I work on or through these things in my own way. I definitely believe that my life is predetermined by God, and while my life isn't perfect - it is what it is - and I'm ok with that... To quote Jason Aldean's song Good to Go - "I had and All-American Mom and Dad, some of the coolest friends you could ever have, found love I thought I'd never find - sometimes I can't believe this life is mine..." Those lines in that song define me, but there are a boatload of other songs that do, as well...

Wow... Decided on a name, now what? I had so many things to say all the other days I just THOUGHT about having my own blog! It's actually not my first attempt at blogging, but it IS the first time I have put so much thought into becoming a real blogger! I am a reader of many, many blogs... I am blessed by so many different types of blogs. Other than using this as a way to keep family and friends up-to-date and to journal, I seek to BE a blessing...